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#145) et les informations de l’auteur sont des détails importants à considérer, tout comme la description :« Asalamwalaikum warahmatullah. Notre podcast est terminé. Nous planifions une chose, Allah en planifie une autre. Assurez-vous de nous suivre sur nos autres chaînes alors que nous poursuivons l’aube de différentes manières. Chaîne Faiyads : https://youtube.com/@FaiyadFit https://www.instagram.com/faiyadfit/ Chaîne Ramis : https://youtube.com/@ramialkhaleel https://www.instagram.com/ramialkhaleel/ Chaîne Anghels : https://www.youtube.com/@anghmalik https://www.instagram.com/revertmind/ Timestamps 0:00 – L’application Athan 0:42 – Introduction 1:11 – Gérer les Nafs (désirs) 3:10 – Pourquoi les hommes célibataires s’adonnent à l’amour-propre 5:55 – Pourquoi les hommes mariés s’adonnent à l’amour-propre 10:12 – Non résolu Le traumatisme de l’enfance comme facteur 12:00 – Déterminer la raison 12:37 – Construire de bonnes habitudes grâce à la routine 16:39 – L’importance du Taqwa et de l’Ihsan 22:35 – Éviter le Haram en changeant la routine 23:28 – Le mariage n’est pas une solution facile 23:52 – La tromperie de P 26:25 – Effets néfastes et dangers de l’amour-propre 31:07 – Rôle de psychologie dans le développement de la sexualité 33:07 – Aucune justification pour faire du Haram 33:44 – La dégénérescence de la société moderne 34:38 – La punition de s’adonner au Haram 35:55 – Progresser dans la vie vers Allah ﷻ 37:21 – Avantages de NoFap 41:24 – La question de la rationalisation des péchés 46:57 – Les rechutes 47:35 – Être mieux sans savoir à quoi ça ressemble 48:34 – L’importance de la sincérité dans Tawbah 50:29 – Remarques de clôture : s’adresser aux téléspectateurs 53:12 – Conclusion 53:25 – Outro #The3Muslims #Nofap #Addiction #Marriage #Muslim #Islam #Religion #Dieu #Allah #SelfImprovement ».

En tant que plateforme ouverte, YouTube permet à chaque utilisateur de découvrir des vidéos abordant une multitude de sujets, tout en garantissant des interactions sécurisées et respectueuses des normes communautaires. Cela en fait un espace de dialogue enrichissant pour explorer divers intérêts personnels.

La communauté NoFap est un pilier essentiel pour les hommes cherchant à se libérer de leurs dépendances.

Explorer l’impact des forums et des groupes de soutien sur la progression des participants dans leurs objectifs.

Les recherches scientifiques ont prouvé que les forums de la communauté NoFap sont cruciaux pour surmonter l’anxiété et la dépression. Ces groupes de soutien augmentent les chances de succès dans l’abandon de la masturbation grâce à la solidarité de leurs membres.

Mettre l’accent sur l’influence positive du soutien social et émotionnel sur la réussite de l’abstinence.

La plateforme Nofap et ses forums offrent un environnement propice pour que les hommes partagent leurs expériences et solutions, tout en les soutenant dans la gestion de la dépression, de l’anxiété, et des rechutes. Un accompagnement qualifié est parfois indispensable (à ce sujet voir ce service pour la pratique Nofap).

Les forums NoFap permettent d’accéder à une communauté de soutien avec des discussions ouvertes.

Les participants des forums peuvent non seulement s’entraider, mais aussi découvrir des études scientifiques liées à leur expérience de l’abstinence.

Les effets de l’abstinence sur les hommes sont visibles à la fois sur le plan physique et mental.

Évaluer les effets psychologiques de l’abstinence pour l’homme est crucial pour comprendre ses bienfaits.

L’abstinence permet de réduire l’anxiété et la dépression chez l’homme, tout en favorisant la confiance en soi. Les discussions sur les forums NoFap révèlent des progrès psychologiques.

Étudier l’impact de l’arrêt de la masturbation sur la diminution de la dépression et de l’anxiété.

Chez l’homme, la dépendance à la pornographie et à la masturbation entraîne des niveaux élevés d’anxiété. L’arrêt de ces comportements permet souvent une réduction notable de la dépression et une reprise du contrôle sur leurs habitudes.

Examiner l’impact de l’abstinence sur la performance érectile.

Les troubles de l’érection causés par la masturbation sont souvent corrigés par une pratique d’abstinence, selon les chercheurs.

Découvrir le NoFap : un nouveau départ pour les hommes

NoFap propose de remplacer ces habitudes par des pratiques favorisant l’équilibre.

NoFap est une initiative pour les hommes cherchant à se libérer des habitudes liées à la pornographie et à la masturbation. Ce concept vise à réduire la dépendance et à promouvoir une santé mentale et physique optimale.

Explorer les motivations qui sous-tendent NoFap est une étape clé pour en comprendre l’impact sur la vie des pratiquants.

La communauté NoFap se bat contre les méfaits de la pornographie, cherche à améliorer la performance érectile et à réduire l’anxiété. Plusieurs hommes sondés ont rapporté une diminution de la dépression et des pensées suicidaires après avoir arrêté la pornographie.

Observer l’impact de la pornographie sur la santé mentale et physique des hommes.

L’étude de la pornographie par des scientifiques a montré qu’elle peut provoquer des troubles comme la dysfonction érectile, la dépression, l’anxiété et l’addiction. Nicole Prause a publié des recherches sur l’influence de la consommation excessive de pornographie sur la santé mentale et physique des hommes.

Conseils pratiques pour réussir dans NoFap

Soutien de NoFap pour rester sur la voie de l’abstinence

Le succès passe par des habitudes saines, comme le sport et la méditation, pour se concentrer sur ses objectifs tout en restant motivé.

Les rechutes peuvent être maîtrisées avec des techniques appropriées.

Les rechutes ne sont pas une fin mais un obstacle naturel dans NoFap. Une étude a montré qu’en analysant les échecs et en sollicitant la communauté, les participants peuvent réussir à surmonter ces défis.

Ressources pratiques sur le NoFap pour une meilleure compréhension.

Pour une meilleure compréhension, des études scientifiques, comme celles de Nicole Prause, offrent des éclairages sur les effets de la dépendance à la pornographie et à la masturbation ainsi que les solutions possibles.

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#COMMENT #NOFAP #VOUS #DONNE #DES #SUPER #POUVOIRS

Retranscription des paroles de la vidéo: the prophet saw mentioned that the bridge between belief and disbelief is abandoning salah if you’re struggling with your salah right now well we got the perfect solution for you and that solution is the adan app this cell phone we usually have it and is using us instead of us using it but with the adana you can use it in perfect alignment with your life the adan app is already used by 40 million believers around the world why because it caters to your islamic lifestyle on top of this a lot of times you get the welcome back to the release podcast in the dunya we’re joined here with look at this handsome guy man and this guy as well i’m about to grow all right all right for real what are we talking about today bro uh we’re getting into something very important very important okay guys muslim men the biggest thing that we deal with is our nafs right whether you’re married whether you’re not married it’s very difficult and this is why it’s you know said for us to lower our gaze now it’s also for women as well like women should lower their gaze but let’s be honest as men like we are visual you know we speak we’ve spoken about this many times and as men you know we see something and we’re just captivated by it so when it’s involved with our sexual desires at the same times like it becomes even harder and this is why like we’re bringing it into today’s video because it’s something that has to be talked about we have to discuss a game plan here for the brothers because there are brothers that are married that are going through this brothers that are not married primarily i’d say the brothers that are not married they’re the ones that are really really going through this um and they resort to things which are not permissible they resort to [Music] let’s uh for the purpose of the algorithm we will use self love getting to describe the m word so self love and we will say p for the videos about that you’re gonna forget that in like five minutes bro they they resort to getting off and this is not this is not good i mean come on like yeah even if if you guys weren’t muslim would you think that’s all right no there’s something about it that just doesn’t say right with your feather bro yeah the guilt what what are you doing bro she’s talking about oh stuck for life y’all could see what i was seeing but going bro i don’t think we have a soundbite for that one man how dare you okay so like i said we want to lay out a game plan here the game plan first off you got to figure out why it is that you’re dealing with what you’re dealing with so we’ll get into that all right from y’all’s perspective why do you think men are dealing with this issue aside from the fact that we’re just visual creatures there’s so many i think one of the things is just it’s a form of escapism you’re escaping from something i ask most of my clients right usually it comes down to either they’re escaping from the reality that they need to change something to get the intimacy back popping with the wife or they are miserable with their job or there’s some there’s some stress or something that they’re running away from which is causing them to resort to this that’s very true i’m going to talk about this from mainly a non-married person perspective because usually people most of the time bring the problem into marriage not develop a problem in marriage unless they’re just not intimate with their wife and it’s almost as if they’re single so i would say that the main issue that young men have is basically seeing women everywhere no matter where you go if you have tick-tock instagram twitter youtube any social media that has ever existed you’re going to see young beautiful women and when you see that you’re gonna whether it’s for a second or you’re staring at it you’re going to feel something it’s unfortunate but it’s everywhere you go outside you see it in the magazines it’s there the tv is there at the malls everywhere except like dimension the house of allah alhamdulillah just don’t turn around you know don’t look at the sister section inshallah you’ll be good um so that’s a lot to do with lowering gays you know it’s difficult to lower your gaze when you’re scrolling through your phone you scroll down and directly in your line of sight is something that tick tock wants you to see but you know damn well you shouldn’t be looking at it and that is going to trigger these emotions that you want to do blah blah blah you don’t have an outlet and then you start one thing leads to another that’s the very simplistic answer there are more steps i’ll talk about later on that like habits and atmosphere and all that stuff that leads you to the point where you’re actually doing it which are very very important to talk about but for now i’ll leave my answer at that that’s the main perpetrator these emotions that you’re talking about that rise within us as men right yeah we talked about mental health last week and it’s not it’s not the worst thing in the world to have these emotions a matter of fact it makes us human and in islam we don’t shun these emotions we don’t have a taboo on sexuality or having urges and desires we have permissible outlets and we have impermissible outlets that’s what you’re trying to say right yeah yeah and that’s not bad that we have these yeah in the main issue the main issue is is feeding into this by looking at things you shouldn’t be looking at whether it’s purposeful or not that’s why the pros and cons told us or sorry allah commanded us in the quran so you come from the perspective of a dude who’s not made yes no you fired you are married and [Music] you coming from a merry place like what do you think married men like why do you think they go to this place where they start struggling with it i think i have three potential answers that i want to give you number one they came into the marriage with this issue number two they’re away from their wives and number three they’re with their wives but something ain’t happening bro they ain’t getting none and i want to focus on mainly the last one at the end obviously because it’s something i think is is really you know we can work with that there’s it’s fixable you know but the first two are a little more complex usually when you and and there’s dangers of it too which we’ll talk about inshallah i don’t know if you talked about this in the briefing but we do want to talk about you know ed and stuff that could happen if you do it too much you know but main story is or long story short if you have a contingency with getting off to self-love and you’ve been doing this for a few years and you finally get married self-love self-love i think it ain’t even self-love listen we’ll use the self-love as for the algorithm right because we can’t we can’t say getting off too much bro you don’t know what’s going to be censored today subhan allah okay continue but for the purpose of this self-love um if you are loving yourself too much before marriage once you do get married and this is a phenomenon with a lot of women too right because we don’t want to rule out the sisters here this is something that’s affecting both subhanallah um [Music] no spouse will be able to please you the way you please yourself and this is something that is gonna take people a little bit of time to understand especially the single brothers and sisters but intimacy with a spouse is way different than if you’re doing haram with yourself it’s extremely different and that’s the reason why a lot of people form stuff like erectile dysfunction because no partner will be able to please you the way you have conditioned yourself to be pleased right and this affects women more psychologically but it does affect men more by numbers because i see more men addicted to watching than women so this is the first thing um the second thing was when you are with your wife but you’re not with her so for example um i know a couple people i’m not gonna mention any names here right no name zone but a couple of uh brothers we have they have multiple wives mashallah and when they’re with one wife they have a halal intimacy obviously everything is good mashallah and they travel to another country and they have another wife there not for the sole purpose of obviously intimacy but they have multiple wives multiple spouses and it’s a permissible outlet it’s it’s something that is permissible in islam and they’re fulfilling each other’s rights and everything’s good however some people don’t have multiple lives or they’re alone in a time where let’s say they’re addicted to intimacy or they’re getting too used to intimacy so let’s say you’re with your spouse and you actually don’t have control over your enough so like on how saying but because you’re with your wife 24 7 you can just get it 24 7. so to speak so you actually never got to a point where you’re controlling enough you’re just always with your wife so it’s always permissible anyway now you take this individual and you take him into an environment where he has no women yeah and just his phone you can already put two and two together what’s going to happen because he never got over the discipline or over the urge and and addiction and never form that discipline to kind of like okay i’m okay having access to intimacy but i’ll say no sometimes you know so when he finally gets no access he doesn’t know what to do and then the last thing we can always talk about later about you know a man or a woman who is in a relationship or marriage and intimacy is not happening inshallah that’s what the future episodes are for that’s why i want to go into it uh but yeah bro rami what about you i mean what’s the question what’s your question bro he always spoke oh i’m the legend yeah he said the point from a like someone who’s not married you said point from someone who is married and i guess i would just add on just so this part of the the game playing here is that another reason why people tend to have this issue is because of something that happened in their childhood like if y’all didn’t watch the video that we made on mental health make sure to watch this video first and then head over and watch that one uh you know inshallah but usually we have things that happen in our childhood if we do not take care of these things then it ends up following us into adulthood and if it follows us into adulthood we have no ideas there it’s going to be controlling us from behind the scenes and like maybe someone was abused as a kid and because they were abused as a kid you know like it was this outlet for them like you said it’s a distraction it’s a distraction and then on top of that like romney said it’s constantly there they’re being bombarded with it everywhere they go they’re being exposed to it so not only is it normal for them it’s been normalized but it’s also something that they are pulled to because it it distracts them if it makes them forget the fact that they went through so-and-so thing you know and like i said in the video with the mental health you know when we have this issue we have some kind of issue whatever we did back then it worked for us then but it it doesn’t work for us anymore so a lot of guys a lot of brothers out here you know this i’m not here to condemn you i’m i’m not the one that’s here to pass judgment um [Music] what what was done in the past was done in the past you know like at some point or another like it i guess it helped you through but now it’s time like you got to really put things into perspective and and really see okay in which of these does your specific situation lie you know like was it what rami said was it what fire said was it what i said was it a combination you know figuring that out you have to figure out why are you struggling with this issue you have to figure out exactly the details for yourself in order for you to fully develop this game plan alright so the next part of this game plan now you know why you are experiencing what you are experiencing so now you got to look at what does your life look like your routine you know routine is a big big big part here like have you ever tried to um start something new in your life like maybe like a hobby or some kind of habit or something waking up early or something it’s always the hardest in the beginning yeah but like not only is it the hardest in the beginning but have you noticed like if you keep everything else in your life the same but then try to change this one thing it kind of doesn’t stick but then when you try to like change a few extra things give me an example an example so let’s say you’re trying to make this habit of working out more okay let’s say usually in your day what you do is you’re working sitting down working um then when you’re done working you go and you sit down on the couch and now you’re watching tv for the rest of the night so you sedentary all day long so you’re basically going to add now working out to the equation so let’s say you’re going to work out like two or three times a week right so you get off work and then you go work out but then what do you do when you get off or you do when you get off what do you do when you get out the gym you go back home you eat and you sit your ass back down on the couch right so you have this pattern of behavior that it’s like you going to the gym two or three times a week is not going to break your cyclical pattern of behavior your cycle right now if you were to let’s say go to the gym and you were to also change your nutrition and you were to implement a standing desk where you were not standing while you’re working well now it’s a whole the game has changed now you get out of the gym and instead of you sitting down you’re more likely to do something else like you may want to clean the house so you may want to go for a walk or do something like with your friends or with your family or something like this why because there are more changes at play there’s more going on where your body is like okay we can no longer stay in the same cycle we have to develop this new cycle and that’s that’s the whole point i’m trying to make here yeah yeah i want to pick you back that point because that’s something i wanted to talk about actually you’ll find a lot of commonalities i talked about this and when i mentioned like atomic habits and all that you’ll find a lot of commonalities you’ll find that more often than not you do the action the same time in the same place under the same circumstances if i eat something unhealthy every time i walk in the kitchen and then i stop walking the kitchen i’ll stop eating on healthy inks right unhealthy things that’s a very basic example right it’s not going to be as simple but you’re fine about to say it’s like the uh the snack drawer bro if you stop opening up the snack drawer you’ll stop getting lost in the wonderland yeah exactly exactly no don’t press nothing i’m not don’t worry bro i saw you look down don’t worry bro time so how dare you this guy so uh you’ll find more often than not you’re in the same place at the same time under the same conditions right same circumstances if you are alone in your room at 7 p.m and you find you’re doing this a lot then don’t be alone in your room at 7 pm right make sure you’re actually with people in the gym at 7 00 pm consistently then maybe by the time you work out you’ve had a long day you’ll get back you’re too tired to want to do it or maybe you want to do it but you’re tired enough to fall asleep so that you don’t right do this enough times and eventually you’ll have a proper consistent cycle now it’s not easy it’s not easy to be in that state where you’re like you know i want to do this everything in my body is telling me to do this i’ve done it every day for the past like 20 years i want to do it and then you don’t that’s a very difficult thing and i don’t want to undermine how difficult that is but that’s when having a healthy environment healthy friends proper outlets um and and just a proper structured life is going to come in handy i do want to say another thing that’s underrated is having more tawakkalan and allah of course right we should trust that allah will help us get over and overcome these issues but taqwa is something extremely underrated bro this level of keeping allah always on your mind 24 7 as much as we can it prevents us from doing a lot of stuff bro and i know i know a lot of you might be like oh why are you talking about that you know it’s going gonna put me off of it now that’s the point that’s the point because how many people can think of allah or think of islam and and everything they’ve been blessed with and then simultaneously go you know most people won’t most people have fitra at the end of day so being in a state of wudhu as much as you can really does help because of the wadu as a shield right and it brings purity um another thing you can do is get on dean moore obviously these are basic things but i know a lot of brothers right that have told me directly from firsthand experience that going to umrah or going to hajj really did change their life masha’allah of course as it should right that’s why it’s prescribed and allah allows those things that are obligatory the most right but really seeing the kaaba going to the house of allah game changer like they they came back and they’re like i don’t smoke weed anymore they came back they’re like i don’t j off anymore they came back and there’s so many things that are just gone from their life just like that yeah subhanallah yeah that’s very important um there’s a hadith very famous hadith the prophet was with his companions and a strange man came in this man was actually in the form of a man asked what is uh iman what is islam it was and this thing prophesied he described it as worshiping allah as if you can see him and knowing that he could see you and that following along what you said about having taqwa god consciousness as if you can’t see him no worse although you can’t yeah like you know imagine if you could see allah right you know may allah you know forgive us protect us i’m not trying to say anything like outrage is here um people in general will see allah but in this life we’re not meant to obviously imagine if you could though that level of worship that you would have for allah and like every moment that’s where sen is as if you can although you can and know that he can see you and that comes in you know obviously comes in handy in moments like that where you think i’m alone no one can see me you’re not trying to think of that actually there was a study recently that you reminded me of fayette um where basically it talks about cheaters and you know when they cheat on their spouse a lot of them obviously they don’t think about their spouse when they’re in the moment they try their absolute hardest to forget everything about their life their their their their wife their husband their kids um you know father and mother-in-law even work and they try and put everything behind them as if they’re living some kind of double life so if you were to remember allah in this moment then you can’t have two there’s going to be a battle either you’re going to forget allah or you’re going to forget what you want to do or an abstain from it and that is is again it’s uncomfortable bro it’s weird it feels wrong it’s uncomfortable but it’s something that has to be done otherwise you’re just going to fall short it’s kind of like when we talk about music and you were like music and quran can’t exist in the same heart yeah so you you it’s really hard to like take something out of your life except that you replace it with something else just like anh was saying it kind of links to what you were saying too that you don’t change one thing except you change other things to kind of accommodate for that you know what i mean yeah and it’s facts bro oh and it was crazy i saw this thing where when men do something like this or when anyone does something that’s uh it’s filthy it’s like it’s impermissible we shouldn’t be doing it yeah within that moment like you you’re basically in a state of disbelief because you’re doing something that’s like going completely against which you’ve been told yeah you’re not pulling the kaffir card yeah i’m not thinking it’s not a state of coffer i’m not saying that but it’s like this is what i heard was like you’re doing this thing and you’re basically in a state of disbelief while you’re doing it imagine something happens to you in that state imagine you’re gonna die in that state bro like that that would be a tragedy that would be a big tragedy and like when we’re talking about this like both of you are correct you should have taqwa and then you’re correct as well where it’s like you know when when you’re getting into that state like you you’re about to fall into it you you have the dark one it’s like you have to choose between okay you know believing in allah and like fully pretending yourself to this or just forgetting about that and then going to this and then it’s bro like any guy who’s going through this issue they know that like when when the naps take over there is no taco yeah bro it’s like yeah it’s like they don’t care about anything it’s like it’s like in finding nemo i’ve said i said this in like my very first video on youtube um but it’s like i called it the finding nemo effect where you remember uh the shark how the shark was like all all cool and everything wanted to like be friends like fish your friends not food yeah but then it’s like when uh the blue fish dory had like smacked herself she had a little bit of blood that like came out and then the shark smelled and his eyes just went black and then from there he just turned to like predator attack mode i was like well that’s what happens to us like when our knives take over we basically it’s like we’re no longer in control like we’re no longer here like we take the back seat something else is driving and um i don’t think this is the time and place for me to like say in detail what joe or ro jogen had said ro jogen yeah well roy jogen has said when he’s it’s like when you’re when you’re doing the deed it’s it’s like you’re driving a bus have you have you guys heard that no uh bro i i’m not gonna say it because it’s it’s just this is haram haram making light of a situation that shouldn’t be made lighter you know that’s a series so again this is the second part is figuring out what your day-to-day routine is like understanding that you can’t just change one thing keep everything the same like romney said if if at 7 pm you are in your bed and you are about to you know do something you shouldn’t quit being in your bed at 7 p.m like do something else go be with your family go be with your friends go go outside for a walk or something like these are things that you have to change you have to change your cycle you have to change your patterns of behavior if you want these changes to stick why is this because there’s two things that can happen you either put all your attention in trying to get past the old or you put all your attention in trying to build the new yeah yeah and i want to actually jump on that point there because a lot of people are going to be like okay i’ll just get married right and although that works for some people believe it or not it’s not actually a solution because what happens to a lot of people unfortunately is you they end up carrying that issue of uh whatever whatever yeah that addiction into their marriage now they’re watching things other women on their phone while they’re married that actually happens and you know this maybe this is too soon to talk about it maybe we’ll save it for another episode but it’s all fake and they’re setting themselves up for fairly when they condition themselves to see these women that they see in these videos even on tick tock and tv and other places women don’t look like that they don’t and the things they’ll do to their bodies one person was telling me about it they will literally bleach downstairs to make it look more appealing or attractive they’ll do disgusting things it’s all fake it’s not gonna happen these are like there’s like 15 people in the room bro yeah while they’re getting a man and all that stuff audio video crew lighting yeah you know it’s literally saying uh cut action yeah yeah literally like like i always i don’t wanna call you off but i do wanna make a quick point here there’s this guy i was watching on youtube and he made this analogy he was like would you ever be in a room where two people are having intimacy and would you just sit in the corner and like get off to them no it sounds weird but it’s the same thing though with the screen of pixels yeah what everyone’s doing you know yeah 100 100 i had made the analogy a long time ago where it’s like if you’re hungry do you watch other people eat or do you go and eat mmm yeah speaking of mrs b of course yeah yeah 100 and um just to add on to the whole kind of idea that it’s fake it’s like you know you ever see the video like on like some videos on youtube or on tv or on tick tock it’s like uh these actions performed by professionals do not attempt at home unfortunately they are professionals they have no sensitivity down there after a certain while they will literally do anything they don’t feel it anymore your wife is not going to perform like that i’m talking to men because mainly men struggle with this right your wife’s not going to perform like that if you think if you think she is you’re in the wrong place and you’re going to ruin her life because she’s going to be depressed and upset that she can’t please you and she’s going to think she’s broken it’s her fault and you’re broken it’s your fault something you need to fix so marriage is actually not the solution to that problem unfortunately a lot of parents will encourage that line of thinking if you’re a parent that’s not the line of things you should have you should have the line of thinking of one i messed up i should have taught my son about this before i even hit puberty my fault i take the l i move on second point okay now let me deal with it if they won’t listen to you get someone they will listen to to talk to them about it they need to resolve this on their own using the things that we talked about send them this video inshallah and i’ll let you guys take it from there i wanna i wanna say one more point two before we kind of wrap up this chapter but a lot of the things that we will talk about now onward in the podcast is going to be you know at least for this episode is what you notice when you’re doing it and why you should actually want to change in the first place because a lot of people are like bro why should i work out why should i worry about mental health so we talked about that right but why should people get over this addiction why should this be something that they stop what is the benefit of nofap right but before we talk about the benefits how does it mess up your life there’s one thing i want to talk about which is this whole fetish right you’re basically desensitizing yourself to watching a guy on a screen basically have intimacy with a woman that you wish you were in place of like you wish you could swap places with that guy you wish you could be with that woman in that in that moment stuck for allah but instead of doing it right in a permissible way you now are basically it’s like his success is your success his game is your game and you kind of get off to the fact that okay i can’t do it but i’ll be okay with that and and that’s the root of where this whole fetish comes from bro people today are are literally paying thousands of dollars to escorts to come and take their wife in front of them just because that’s that’s the only thing that could get them off bro but aside from that what other dangers or or reasons do you guys have that people should quit this in the first place well one thing that i heard is desensitization yes not just desensitization downstairs if i even say the word correctly not just that because i heard that you know literally touching yourself like that in that you know vigorous and honestly um disrespectful manner you know rubbing yourself like that you desensitize you’re actually damaging your your nerves down there so you stop feeling more and more over time you feel less and less over time and it’s very harmful damaging and it makes actually doing the deed harder and harder it’s not just that it actually gets you so fixated on the the the rise that you get out of it that that dopamine you get out of it you become desensitized more and more to that as well to the point where maybe even actually having intercourse and being with a woman is just not that great to you you know if take a man who’s never ever stimulated himself in his life and he’s with a woman for the first time that’s gonna be the second third fourth fifth time of his life is gonna be the time of his life you take someone who’s been doing it every day for the past like 10 years it’s not going to be as enjoyable for the guy he’s going to be messed up and like to add on to that it also desensitizes you in terms of like not physical stimulation but the mental stimulation the the what’s happening here like in your mind in your brain yeah and it’s like you know when we are engaging in intimacy we have certain neurotransmitters that are being released you don’t have to get into crazy detail but you have one like dopamine serotonin these are very very important especially when you are engaged in intimacy now when a man is watching a i don’t know well what’s the word what are we going to use the word for so we don’t get caught in video rhythm when uh uh when when a man is watching and he’s watching right what ends up happening is you’re getting this unnatural release of dopamine into your system you’re not going to get that when you naturally engage with your screen never right now what’s happening here is like not only are you getting this unnatural amount of dopamine but you’re setting yourself up for like certain things like you’re expecting certain things and and it’s been known that it’s called the uh the coolidge effect something like that you’re you’re going to progressively get into more hardcore things mm-hmm as you watch slippery slope bro so yeah it’s a slippery slope if you get to this point like listen there’s a lot of dudes out there that have become gay because of this stuff because they start watching it and they start getting into such nasty stuff that they actually start watching guys with guys and we’re animals bro for bro like they kids they get and look it’s you might think to yourself oh i stuck for a lot i would never do this no bro like you’re not safe like no one is safe from this so you have this guy he starts watching this stuff he gets to the point where he’s watching other dudes and now he’s confused he doesn’t even know like well am i straight am i gay like what’s going on here and then it’s like let’s say he actually does have a wife but he’s dealing with this like that’s gonna add even more so to him experiencing issues in the intimacy so the dangers like bro you ask what are the dangers about the dangers is too much to list man yeah yeah it’s too much to list yeah yeah and i just to stress the point about um what you just mentioned you called the coolidge effect but getting more hardcore over time just to stress how effective or how dominant the topic the factor of psychology is when it comes to intimacy sexuality what you find attractive and that stuff there are and we talked about this i think like episode three or something there are only three ways you can actually have a characteristic right physical characteristics even other types of characteristics there’s either biology or more specifically genetics right but overall biology right so those two genetics and overall biology and then there’s psychology the psychological or character characteristics that you have you know things that you develop to like or dislike or so on and so forth right you might absolutely despise something because you were raised you were brought up and taught to despise it as a psychological thing you could in another world actually adore and love that thing because you were taught to love it so on and so forth it’s like people being taught to love islam to love the prophet peace be upon him and others being taught the non-muslims being taught to hate islam hate the prophet you know and same thing if you look at like fetishes for example a lot of them if not most of them a lot of them are the result of childhood trauma unresolved childhood trauma and that doesn’t come out but it stays within and when it stays within it results in that kind of sexual manner unfortunately now psychology is something that obviously it’s not like you know you hit four and this is your psychology the rest of your life you could be 30 and have changes in your psychology that’s why people develop you know psychological disorders and so on and so forth because depending on how you live your life your environment what you perceive what you observe your mind your psychology the way you think whether it’s major or minor is going to change over time so people who think that you know and we live in a sexually promiscuous society unfortunately so people don’t you know understand this for what it is but if you underestimate it it will catch up to you hmm do you have anything to add to that bro before we go on to the benefits aside from just draining yourself bro having no energy messing up your testosterone bro like i don’t know why anyone would justify a bro today there’s no reason bro arami you know how in the quran allah says something like is the reward for good anything but can you what is that that ayah oh yeah is there a reward for a good uh aside from good or something aside from good yeah is there is there a reason i’m not trying to compare this but it’s like is there a reason to abstain from bad aside from bad itself like the fact that you’re doing this and it’s damaged like do you need another reason like it’s literally destroying your soul bro people have gone on the dark web and like 85 to 90 of it is just cp that’s that’s that’s disgusting bro i thought it was like people want to buy things that they can’t buy in the normal market and stuff like that that’s all it is bro and it’s it’s it’s crazy and it’s like the rope like in the west we literally have islands bro no we ain’t saying that over here but bro in the west we literally we won’t allow polygeny where a man takes care of his women folk and has accountability over them but you like just for this false sense of like let’s put on this image that there’s this one woman man and these men are cheating anyway they’re going to islands and having these things like epstein like bro like islam is so clean and pure but society just wants fascia and and filth and then haram and this whole backwardness bro bro and i think like the biggest thing that i’m gonna lay on the table here pause and um so i’m sure y’all or anyone who has gone through this will understand any time that you do something that’s haram so it doesn’t just have to part you know mean this but anytime you do something that’s haram you go against allah you don’t get rewarded you get punished like you know if we die in that state of punishment like imagine the the punishment that’s going to be in that you have to like i wouldn’t want that i wouldn’t want that for anyone either but it’s like i’m saying right now like any time like in my life when things have been going really good and i’ve done something that i’ve gone completely against allah even when i wasn’t a muslim even when i didn’t have this understanding the moment that i would do that it’s like for the next weeks to months i would just be punished until like i learned my lesson so to speak until like i came to my senses and like really realized like the wrong that i did and was able to grow from that experience you know and i think that’s something that we have to keep in mind where it’s like like come on man like it’s we’re all about progress here that sounds kind of weird cause like you know you got people saying oh islam is not progressive i’m not talking about that i’m saying like we all want to make progress right like if let’s say you’re playing a video game you want to get better in the video game you’re progressing you’re getting your stats up getting the armor weapons all this stuff right in real life like what we are doing when you’re getting closer to allah like you you it’s it’s like a status bar like you have to progress to get closer to allah like you’re building a business you have to progress to the point where like this business is fully set up you’re building your body you have to progress to the point where your body is fully developed yeah right like there’s there’s this time and every time that you go against allah every time you do something every time you you do this you’re essentially just going backwards going backwards and and each time that you try to go forward again like you’re starting at a place that’s further back than where you were before so it’s like why would you do that knowing that clearly you can make it to that angle you can make it to the point where you have that close connection with allah like you have the barakah and i don’t know this is just you know like i’m just throwing my thoughts out here but it’s something that people in this situation dudes in this situation really need to keep in mind if if this is really that important to them i want to go into the superpowers bro the quote unquote superpowers that you get once you quit benefits okay so even if it’s does it is it true that it makes hair grow on your palms or it causes you to get blind no uh okay so in terms of the superpowers people will experience benefits in regards to like how bad off they were like for instance if we have an example of uh the benefits that people experience when they get onto this it’s all dependent on how you know bad off they were so let’s say you have this guy who is releasing like five six times a day which is not that much all right there’s a lot of guys that go even more than this that’s crazy um yeah it is stuck for a lot it’s crazy you have dude who’s doing like five six times she’s laughing about it i’m loving the new sound that romney got yeah i wish we had all right but you had this guy he’s doing it like five six times a day okay this guy will experience more benefits than the guy who’s maybe doing it like one time every three four days yeah because the guy’s doing one time every three four days like he never developed that bad of an issue now um when you start getting deeper and deeper into it because you’re having such unnatural amounts of dopamine being released into your your brain your mind it’s it’s causing you to be in a state that’s very unnatural and um nothing in this world replicates that amount of dopamine like you can’t i can’t sit here and talk to you have a normal conversation and have the same amount of dopamine yeah from this conversation as i would if i was over here watching adult films yeah doing it five six times a day i can’t yeah i can’t so this person when they stop it’s like the brain begins to literally heal and now it’s like they’re sensitizing themselves to all these things and because they’re sensitizing themselves they start to experience these benefits benefits could be like increased eye contact they’re able to increase their eye contact they’re able to have more focus they um they feel more confident right like why they feel more confident because they’re less stuck in their head you know like they’re in a conversation and they feel like they can connect with the other person why can they connect with the other person because they’re actually there they’re present the amount of dopamine they’re getting from that interaction is enough for them to [Music] function to actually be there and be connected with them they can go outside they can see the birds flying around and they will have an impact on them versus before they might have seen the birds and it’s like eh like it is what it is right so that’s and that’s that’s the benefits now as far as like what benefits you’re going to experience that’s that’s different for everyone [Music] so you don’t get x-ray vision like i just want to know uh only if you go at least like three four years masha’allah three four years um if you guys did make it this far let us know what you guys think um not that the episode’s over anything like that but quick word from our sponsor rami are we doing that now yeah throw it in i was actually thinking maybe we should why not i don’t have anything prepared um that’s true okay guys insha allah see you guys next week same thing i’m just playing um one question i had for both of you all right we don’t want to air our sins or stuff in the past or anything like that obviously as muslims we should have hayah and in our past otherwise put a blanket over right but to the brothers and sisters that think it’s so normal bro everyone’s doing it you know that brother ana was talking about on the podcast that does the six or six does it eight nine ten times a day i’m only doing it once a day or i’m only doing it once a week is it really that bad that i’m not as bad as everyone else oh everyone else is going to the club and drinking and all this i just drink with my co-workers once a year on the annual whatever gala you know oh everyone else is smoking like with everyone recreationally i only do it when i when i’m just you know i’m done my work you know i study and i get my work done you know all these people that try to like rationalize it and they say this whole i’m not that far gone what’s what’s what’s the harm in a little bit well this is this reminds me of this video i saw from newman ali khan i think y’all y’all might know which one i’m talking about nope how do we lose our iman i think it’s that one where he’s saying like um this comparison thing it’s it’s of the dunya and it’s actually a sickness but he’s like what are you gonna do like let’s say you were praying x amount of times but you were doing all these things bad right and then you raised up on the day of judgment and allah is like oh you did this and you do that he’s like oh but like compared to this this brother over here like he was barely praying like you sh you should just give me the like a straight ticket to jenna like i should be vip janna right away because i did much better than this guy over here it’s like well it’s the same thing it’s a sickness you know you can’t look at someone else and be like oh well i’m not doing it uh to the same extent as them so i’m better off like i’m not gonna have a what i’m laughing about something from yesterday bro yeah you remember when rami went to bed and we were watching the the podcast [Laughter] yo i just want to give a quick shout out to our editor guys mashallah like link’s in the description for his instagram or socials or whatever but like huge shout out to our editor for just always being on point with the edits color grading everything’s done alhamdulillah it’s a good word bro but that being said i think we are going to wrap up this episode since we are getting a little brain dead stay tuned for next week insha allah we’re going to go into a little bit deeper of the topics and go into the actual intimacy stuff um aside from that do y’all have anything to say yeah i wanted to answer the question do you want to finish off what are you saying first um i wanted to leave him with like the final part of the game so uh you uh what was your question again i had something so like all of these people trying to like i remember right now play devil’s advocate like yeah oh yeah i’m not as bad as everyone else yeah yeah so i want to take it from two different angles right no no you’re the only one that ah this is haram the dirtiest mind bro it’s always the quiet ones well he’s finally come out all right so i want to approach this discussion from two different viewpoints respectively in sha allah if i may so the first viewpoint i would like to discuss is first i want to question their line of thinking their logic right so everyone’s doing it and everyone thinks it’s cool and you think it’s wrong yeah what what were people in america doing during the cross-atlantic slave trade what were they propagating what were they encouraging what did they think was normal back then would we have the same views today you know a few decades ago even in world war ii in germany what were people propagating there would you then say that you know since it was a majority it was okay it was morally acceptable or blah blah you wouldn’t same thing here look at people who are smoking people who are drinking people who are on drugs and so on so there’s so many people doing it does that mean it’s a good thing it’s beneficial it’s going to help you or does it mean that it’s not going to harm you no not at all actually many things even medical practitioners will actually recommend things that are harmful to uh to a person remember we were talking about in the episode about transgenderism in the documentary what is a woman and all that stuff they uncovered a lot of stuff there’s a lot of dark things that people will push now that normalize that they say it’s okay but it’s not so that’s one the uh the logic of it two i wanna discuss um these people and look at other people doing it and so on and so forth why not only why is it majority rule but the second point i want to make on it is just because someone’s doing it worse doesn’t somehow uh excuse you from it it might make you better in contrast to them right but it’s still fallacious in the sense that it doesn’t actually remove the original deed the original sin from you all right if if i come and i’m like you know i have the let’s say angel tells me not to eat the last um you know i don’t know a piece of chicken or whatever and i go and i eat it anyways and he comes and he’s like why did you eat it you know i asked you not to and i say it’s not like i ate the whole thing yeah i didn’t eat the whole thing but that doesn’t actually excuse me from the fact that he asked me not to eat it and then i ate it anyways the same thing here it’s you know imagine asking the day of judgement allah asks you why do you do this and you say well at least at least i didn’t do this well is that is that going to excuse you i imagine you’re in court you know you you you murdered a person and they’re like why did you do it and you’re like well at least i didn’t murder the whole family you know that’s not like no you should just let me go yanny it’s fallacious i know that’s an extreme example but it still applies there you know just doing it once a day once a month once a year is still worse yes it’s worse than not doing it at all and if anything you should be comparing yourself to someone who doesn’t do it at all i want to say one point before on wraps it up but this whole notion of just once not listen if you’re on a streak right now and you’re thinking of relapsing because you just want to you know just do it get it off once so you think just what’s what’s one time gonna what is it gonna do listen you do it once you’re done yeah it’s over as soon as you do it that first time you’re already gonna be in it too deep as soon as you do it the first time you’re gonna get back into the cycle of like doing a couple times a week or a month or whatever you do just don’t even do it that one time don’t fall for the trip uh tricks of shaytan don’t even give it that that footstep bro yeah remember we were talking about in the car right that’s exactly what i was saying it was you right me and you in the car i don’t know ends up ends up being something else no no i’m pretty sure i was i don’t know if you were there or not but i was saying you know a lot of people they they have this idea of oh i know i just want to party one see what i said i just want to drink once i just want to smoke i just want to see what it’s like you’re better off not knowing what it’s like because your curiosity of what it’s like is not stronger or worse than wanting to do it a second time after feeling whatever you feel afterwards people do it because it feels good imagine you do it you know what it feels like why wouldn’t you want it even more that second time you’re better now having not done it a day in your life or having not done it for a month or two months or a year or 10 years or whatever then try and get once just to get it out there how do you understand how do you how do you think the the psychology of addiction even happens people have this amazing high the first time and they want to recreate that first high so they do second time third time fourth time before they’re in it ten years doing other things other substances just to recreate that first high when in reality they’ll never be able to recreate that bro yeah yeah that’s very true it’ll never happen you want to end it off bro that point well before i end it off i want to say like you also these people they can’t think to themselves like oh allah is the most forgiving and the most merciful so i just have to repent that’s like dude that’s like oh i’m about to i was about to say about to finish someone off but i’m about to end someone’s life oh but allah is the most merciful i’m going to repent i’m going to eat this pork but i’m going to ask for repentance i have to like or just say bismuth before you eat it stuff for a lot like oh i’m gonna drink this alcohol but i’m gonna ask for you know forgiveness it’s basically like what we said in that one episode where you have a this like a bad action with a good intention or good in good action with the attention right now you have this this bad action and then you have the intention of like basically asking for forgiveness i’m sorry but like i’m not i’m not allah but if i had to judge like i wouldn’t accept someone’s forgiveness they’re clearly going into it knowing like yeah one of the um well not to cut you off but one of the conditions of tawba is that you are sincere yeah there’s nothing sincere imagine imagine someone coming to you right let’s not make it about us and allah imagine someone comes to you they’re like listen i’m going to punch you but i’m going to ask for forgiveness afterwards right there’s no class there bro not only are they you know punching you but if anything they they don’t mean the apology exactly it’s premeditated but if they just like if y’all were playing around and then they actually like just jabbed you in the face and they’re like yo like i’m so sorry bro like are you all right are you all right yeah bro that’s sincerity yeah and on top of that afterwards we’re like i’m we’re not starting we’re not going to spar anymore i’m sorry bro yeah we’re not going to do it anymore it’s sincerity yeah 100 sincerity 100 but turn it all off look into their souls bro to end it all off you now know why you are doing what you are doing you now know that you have to change your day-to-day routine your cycle your patterns of behavior you now know the downfalls and you know the rewards the benefits the pros and the cons you know this so now to bring it all together you have to make this priority now to where you’re putting all your attention on it because it should there should be something in the background while you are implementing your new life but it should be the main priority for you to get past this like if you want to get married you should not even be thinking about getting married until this is no longer a factor in your life if you are with a significant other and you guys are having issues listen until you get over this you should not be thinking about anything else yeah you should not i just told him not to think about this but you should not be doing anything else but like it has to take priority in your life you can’t see it as like oh um you know like i’ll get over it eventually that’s it’s not gonna work like that it listen you have to go all in with this you have to do whatever it is that you have to do everyone’s going to be different here you know some people some people for them it takes them saying an oath out loud to allah like putting everything on the table well i know this guy who he actually said something like this and he ended up doing the thing that he said he wasn’t going to do that he promised to allah it was crazy allah it was crazy and what ended up happening is that when he did it he thought to himself oh no it’s not going to happen so he asked for forgiveness but in his mind he thought it wasn’t going to happen what he put on the table what he he basically said to a lot like oh love like if i go back like just strip this away just take this away from me yeah allah took everything away from me everything that he put on the table he he thought it wasn’t gonna happen he thought it was a joke he thought like oh that it’s i just you know like it’s not gonna happen right not allah took everything away from him and i mean like you gotta you gotta put into what’s with heaven and that’s where the priority comes into play here you do whatever you can to get past this this isn’t something to be taken lightheartedly this is a serious thing and just know that your life will be better once you do get past it in every way shape or form inshallah and with that being said [Music] my [Music] um [Music] .

Déroulement de la vidéo:

0.0 the prophet saw mentioned that the bridge between belief and disbelief is abandoning salah if you’re struggling with your salah right now well we got
6.399 the perfect solution for you and that solution is the adan app this cell phone
12.24 we usually have it and is using us instead of us using it but with the adana you can use it in perfect
19.199 alignment with your life the adan app is already used by 40 million believers around the world why because it caters
24.96 to your islamic lifestyle on top of this a lot of times you get the
45.039 welcome back to the release podcast in the dunya we’re joined here
50.559 with look at this handsome guy man and this guy as well i’m about to grow
63.199 all right all right for real what are we talking about today bro uh we’re getting into something very important very
69.119 important okay guys muslim men
74.24 the biggest thing that we deal with is our nafs right whether you’re married whether
80.24 you’re not married it’s very difficult and this is why it’s you know
85.52 said for us to lower our gaze now it’s also for women as well like women should lower their gaze but let’s be honest
91.759 as men like we are visual you know we speak we’ve spoken about this many times
96.88 and as men you know we see something and we’re just captivated by it so when it’s involved with our sexual
103.6 desires at the same times like it becomes even harder and this is why like we’re
109.04 bringing it into today’s video because it’s something that has to be talked about we have to discuss a game plan
114.64 here for the brothers because there are brothers that are married that are going through this brothers that are not
121.2 married primarily i’d say the brothers that are not married they’re the ones that are really really going through this
126.84 um and they resort to things which are not permissible
133.52 they resort to [Music] let’s uh for the purpose of the
139.2 algorithm we will use self love getting to describe the m word so self love
146.72 and we will say p for the videos about that you’re gonna forget that in like five
151.76 minutes bro they they resort to getting off
157.44 and this is not this is not good i mean come on like yeah even if if you guys weren’t muslim
164.72 would you think that’s all right no there’s something about it that just doesn’t say right with your feather
170.0 bro yeah the guilt what what are you doing bro she’s talking about oh stuck for life
176.4 y’all could see what i was seeing but going bro i don’t think we have a soundbite for that one man
182.8 how dare you okay so like i said we want to lay out a game
188.4 plan here the game plan first off you got to figure out why it is that
194.56 you’re dealing with what you’re dealing with so we’ll get into that all right from y’all’s perspective why do you think men
201.599 are dealing with this issue aside from the fact that we’re just visual creatures there’s so many i think one of the things is just it’s a form of
207.2 escapism you’re escaping from something i ask most of my clients right usually it comes down to either they’re escaping
213.28 from the reality that they need to change something to get the intimacy back popping with the wife or
219.44 they are miserable with their job or there’s some there’s some stress or something that they’re running away from which is
225.599 causing them to resort to this that’s very true
230.799 i’m going to talk about this from mainly a non-married person perspective because usually people most of the time bring
236.48 the problem into marriage not develop a problem in marriage unless they’re just not intimate with their wife and it’s almost as if they’re single so
242.879 i would say that the main issue that young men have is basically seeing women everywhere no matter where you go
250.0 if you have tick-tock instagram twitter youtube any social media that has ever existed
256.959 you’re going to see young beautiful women and when you see that you’re gonna whether it’s for a second or you’re
262.8 staring at it you’re going to feel something it’s unfortunate but it’s everywhere you go outside you see it in
268.32 the magazines it’s there the tv is there at the malls everywhere except like dimension the house of allah alhamdulillah just don’t turn around you
274.96 know don’t look at the sister section inshallah you’ll be good um so that’s a lot to do with lowering gays you know it’s difficult to lower your
281.12 gaze when you’re scrolling through your phone you scroll down and directly in your line of sight is something that tick tock wants you to see but you know
287.6 damn well you shouldn’t be looking at it and that is going to trigger these emotions that you want to do blah blah blah you don’t have an outlet and then
293.6 you start one thing leads to another that’s the very simplistic answer there are more steps i’ll talk about later on
299.6 that like habits and atmosphere and all that stuff that leads you to the point where you’re actually doing it which are
304.96 very very important to talk about but for now i’ll leave my answer at that that’s the main perpetrator these emotions that you’re talking about that
310.8 rise within us as men right yeah we talked about mental health last week and it’s not it’s not the worst thing in the world to have these emotions a matter of
316.96 fact it makes us human and in islam we don’t shun these emotions we don’t have a taboo on sexuality or having urges and
323.039 desires we have permissible outlets and we have impermissible outlets that’s what you’re trying to say right yeah yeah and that’s not bad that we have
329.44 these yeah in the main issue the main issue is is feeding into this by looking at things you shouldn’t be looking at
334.96 whether it’s purposeful or not that’s why the pros and cons told us or sorry allah commanded us in the quran
341.919 so you come from the perspective of a dude who’s not made yes no you fired you are married
350.88 and [Music] you coming from a merry place like
357.919 what do you think married men like why do you think they go to this place where
364.24 they start struggling with it i think i have three potential answers that i want to give you number one they came into the
370.88 marriage with this issue number two they’re away from their wives and number three they’re with their
376.8 wives but something ain’t happening bro they ain’t getting none and
382.24 i want to focus on mainly the last one at the end obviously because it’s something i think is is
388.16 really you know we can work with that there’s it’s fixable you know but the first two are a little more
393.84 complex usually when you and and there’s dangers of it too which we’ll talk about inshallah i
399.919 don’t know if you talked about this in the briefing but we do want to talk about you know ed and stuff that could happen if you do it too much you know
406.319 but main story is or long story short if you have a contingency with
412.639 getting off to self-love and you’ve been doing this for a few years and you finally get married
419.759 self-love self-love i think it ain’t even self-love listen we’ll use the self-love as for the algorithm right because we
425.919 can’t we can’t say getting off too much bro you don’t know what’s going to be
431.36 censored today subhan allah okay continue
439.12 but for the purpose of this self-love um if you are loving yourself
444.24 too much before marriage once you do get married and this is a phenomenon with a lot of women too right because we don’t
450.96 want to rule out the sisters here this is something that’s affecting both subhanallah um [Music]
456.96 no spouse will be able to please you the way you please yourself and this is something that is gonna take
464.24 people a little bit of time to understand especially the single brothers and sisters but intimacy with a spouse is way different
471.12 than if you’re doing haram with yourself it’s extremely different and that’s the reason why a lot of people
477.28 form stuff like erectile dysfunction because no partner will be able to please you the way you have conditioned
482.879 yourself to be pleased right and this affects women more psychologically but it does affect men more
489.52 by numbers because i see more men addicted to watching than women so this is the first thing um the second
495.919 thing was when you are with your wife but you’re not with her so for example
501.199 um i know a couple people i’m not gonna mention any names here right no name zone but a couple of uh brothers we have
507.199 they have multiple wives mashallah and when they’re with one wife
512.959 they have a halal intimacy obviously everything is good mashallah and they travel to another country and
518.88 they have another wife there not for the sole purpose of obviously intimacy but they have multiple wives
524.32 multiple spouses and it’s a permissible outlet it’s it’s something that is permissible in islam and they’re
531.36 fulfilling each other’s rights and everything’s good however some people don’t have multiple lives or
536.8 they’re alone in a time where let’s say they’re addicted to intimacy or they’re getting too used to intimacy so let’s
542.399 say you’re with your spouse and you actually don’t have control over your enough so like on how saying but because
548.32 you’re with your wife 24 7 you can just get it 24 7. so to speak so you actually never got to
555.519 a point where you’re controlling enough you’re just always with your wife so it’s always permissible anyway
561.76 now you take this individual and you take him into an environment where he has no women yeah and just his phone
569.2 you can already put two and two together what’s going to happen because he never got over the discipline or over the urge
575.279 and and addiction and never form that discipline to kind of like okay i’m okay having access to intimacy but i’ll say
581.92 no sometimes you know so when he finally gets no access he doesn’t know what to do and then the last thing we can always
588.24 talk about later about you know a man or a woman who is in a relationship or marriage and intimacy is not happening inshallah
594.56 that’s what the future episodes are for that’s why i want to go into it uh but yeah bro rami what about you
600.08 i mean what’s the question what’s your question bro he always spoke oh i’m the legend yeah he said the point
606.72 from a like someone who’s not married you said point from someone who is married
612.64 and i guess i would just add on just so this part of the the game playing here
618.079 is that another reason why people tend to have this issue is because of something that happened in their
623.36 childhood like if y’all didn’t watch the video that we made on mental health make sure to
629.68 watch this video first and then head over and watch that one uh you know inshallah
636.64 but usually we have things that happen in our childhood if we do not take care of these things
641.92 then it ends up following us into adulthood and if it follows us into adulthood we have no ideas there
648.32 it’s going to be controlling us from behind the scenes and like maybe someone was abused as a kid
655.04 and because they were abused as a kid you know like it was this outlet for them like you said it’s a distraction
661.12 it’s a distraction and then on top of that like romney said it’s constantly there they’re being bombarded
667.6 with it everywhere they go they’re being exposed to it so not only is it normal for them it’s been
673.839 normalized but it’s also something that they are pulled to because it it distracts them
681.519 if it makes them forget the fact that they went through so-and-so thing you know
686.8 and like i said in the video with the mental health you know when we have this issue we have
692.32 some kind of issue whatever we did
697.36 back then it worked for us then but it it doesn’t work for us anymore so a lot of guys a lot of brothers out here
704.48 you know this i’m not here to condemn you i’m i’m not the one that’s here to pass judgment
710.72 um [Music] what what was done in the past was done in the past you know like at some point
716.16 or another like it i guess it helped you through but now it’s time like you got to really
722.0 put things into perspective and and really see okay in which of these
728.32 does your specific situation lie you know like was it what rami said
734.079 was it what fire said was it what i said was it a combination you know figuring that out you have to
739.76 figure out why are you struggling with this issue you have to figure out exactly the details for yourself in
746.16 order for you to fully develop this game plan alright so the next part of this game plan now you
752.24 know why you are experiencing what you are experiencing so now you got to look at
759.279 what does your life look like your routine you know routine is a big big big part
765.12 here like have you ever tried to um start something new in your life like maybe like a hobby or some kind of habit
772.079 or something waking up early or something it’s always the hardest in the beginning yeah but like not only is it the hardest in the beginning but have
777.76 you noticed like if you keep everything else in your life the same but then try to change this one
782.88 thing it kind of doesn’t stick but then when you try to like change
789.2 a few extra things give me an example an example so let’s say you’re trying to
796.16 make this habit of working out more okay let’s say
802.72 usually in your day what you do is you’re working sitting down working um then when you’re done working
809.12 you go and you sit down on the couch and now you’re watching tv for the rest of the night so you sedentary all day long
815.36 so you’re basically going to add now working out to the equation so let’s say you’re going to work out
821.519 like two or three times a week right so you get off work and then you go work out but then what do you do when
827.279 you get off or you do when you get off what do you do when you get out the gym
832.88 you go back home you eat and you sit your ass back down on the couch right
838.8 so you have this pattern of behavior that it’s like you going to the gym two or three times a week is not going to
845.04 break your cyclical pattern of behavior your cycle
850.959 right now if you were to let’s say go to the gym and you were to also change your
856.48 nutrition and you were to implement a standing desk where you were not
861.519 standing while you’re working well now it’s a whole the game has changed now you get out of
866.72 the gym and instead of you sitting down you’re more likely to do something else like
872.16 you may want to clean the house so you may want to go for a walk or do something like with your friends or with
877.68 your family or something like this why because there are more changes at play there’s
883.36 more going on where your body is like okay we can no longer stay in the same cycle
889.92 we have to develop this new cycle and that’s
895.04 that’s the whole point i’m trying to make here yeah yeah i want to pick you back that point because that’s something i wanted to talk about actually you’ll
901.279 find a lot of commonalities i talked about this and when i mentioned like atomic habits and all that you’ll find a lot of commonalities you’ll find that
907.6 more often than not you do the action the same time in the same place under the same circumstances
913.68 if i eat something unhealthy every time i walk in the kitchen and then i stop walking the kitchen i’ll stop eating on healthy inks right
919.519 unhealthy things that’s a very basic example right it’s not going to be as simple but you’re
924.839 fine about to say it’s like the uh the snack drawer bro if you stop opening up the snack drawer you’ll stop getting
930.16 lost in the wonderland yeah exactly exactly no don’t press nothing i’m not don’t worry bro i saw you look down
936.72 don’t worry bro time so how dare you this guy
943.44 so uh you’ll find more often than not you’re in the same place at the same
948.639 time under the same conditions right same circumstances if you are alone in your room at 7 p.m and you
955.279 find you’re doing this a lot then don’t be alone in your room at 7 pm right make sure you’re actually with people in the
961.36 gym at 7 00 pm consistently then maybe by the time you work out you’ve had a long day you’ll get back
967.12 you’re too tired to want to do it or maybe you want to do it but you’re tired enough to fall asleep so that you don’t right do this enough times
974.0 and eventually you’ll have a proper consistent cycle now it’s not easy it’s not easy to be in that state where
980.079 you’re like you know i want to do this everything in my body is telling me to do this i’ve done it every day for the past like 20 years i want to do it and
987.279 then you don’t that’s a very difficult thing and i don’t want to undermine how difficult that is but that’s when having a healthy environment healthy friends
994.0 proper outlets um and and just a proper structured life is going to come in handy i do want to say another thing
1000.24 that’s underrated is having more tawakkalan and allah of course right we should trust that allah will help us get over and overcome
1007.519 these issues but taqwa is something extremely underrated bro this level of keeping
1013.36 allah always on your mind 24 7 as much as we can it prevents us from doing a lot of stuff bro and i know i know a lot of you might
1021.04 be like oh why are you talking about that you know it’s going gonna put me off of it now that’s the point that’s the point because how many people can
1027.679 think of allah or think of islam and and everything they’ve been blessed with and then simultaneously go you know most
1033.28 people won’t most people have fitra at the end of day so being in a state of wudhu as much as you can really does
1039.28 help because of the wadu as a shield right and it brings purity um another thing you can do
1044.959 is get on dean moore obviously these are basic things but i know a lot of brothers right that have told me
1050.64 directly from firsthand experience that going to umrah or going to hajj really did change their life masha’allah
1057.28 of course as it should right that’s why it’s prescribed and allah allows those things that are obligatory the most right but really
1063.6 seeing the kaaba going to the house of allah game changer like they they came back
1068.64 and they’re like i don’t smoke weed anymore they came back they’re like i don’t j off anymore they came back and there’s so many things that are just
1075.28 gone from their life just like that yeah subhanallah yeah that’s very important um there’s a
1080.96 hadith very famous hadith the prophet was with his companions and a strange man came in this man was actually
1088.88 in the form of a man asked what is uh iman what is islam it was and this thing prophesied he described
1095.44 it as worshiping allah as if you can see him and knowing that he could see you and that following along what you said
1101.52 about having taqwa god consciousness as if you can’t see him no worse
1108.24 although you can’t yeah like you know imagine if you could see allah right you know may allah you
1113.76 know forgive us protect us i’m not trying to say anything like outrage is here um people in general will see allah but in this life we’re not meant to
1120.08 obviously imagine if you could though that level of worship that you would have for allah and like every moment
1125.919 that’s where sen is as if you can although you can and know that he can see you and that comes in you know
1132.24 obviously comes in handy in moments like that where you think i’m alone no one can see me you’re not trying to think of
1137.679 that actually there was a study recently that you reminded me of fayette um where basically it talks about
1143.2 cheaters and you know when they cheat on their spouse a lot of them obviously they don’t think about their
1148.96 spouse when they’re in the moment they try their absolute hardest to forget everything about their life their their
1155.12 their their wife their husband their kids um you know father and mother-in-law even work and they try and
1160.88 put everything behind them as if they’re living some kind of double life so if you were to remember allah in this moment then you can’t have two there’s
1167.84 going to be a battle either you’re going to forget allah or you’re going to forget what you want to do or an abstain from it and that is is again it’s
1174.48 uncomfortable bro it’s weird it feels wrong it’s uncomfortable but it’s something that has to be done otherwise
1179.84 you’re just going to fall short it’s kind of like when we talk about music and you were like music and quran can’t exist in the same heart yeah so you you
1187.039 it’s really hard to like take something out of your life except that you replace it with something else just like anh was
1192.16 saying it kind of links to what you were saying too that you don’t change one thing except you change other things to kind of accommodate for that you know
1197.76 what i mean yeah and it’s facts bro oh and it was crazy i saw this thing where
1204.08 when men do something like this or when anyone does something that’s uh it’s filthy it’s like it’s impermissible
1210.88 we shouldn’t be doing it yeah within that moment like you you’re basically in a state of
1217.12 disbelief because you’re doing something that’s like going completely against which you’ve been told yeah you’re not pulling the kaffir
1223.84 card yeah i’m not thinking it’s not a state of coffer i’m not saying that but it’s like this is what i heard was like
1229.44 you’re doing this thing and you’re basically in a state of disbelief while you’re doing it imagine something
1234.559 happens to you in that state imagine you’re gonna die in that state bro like that that would be a tragedy
1240.96 that would be a big tragedy and like when we’re talking about this like both of you are correct you should have taqwa
1246.32 and then you’re correct as well where it’s like you know when when you’re getting into that state like you you’re about to fall into it you you have the
1252.159 dark one it’s like you have to choose between okay you know believing in allah and like
1257.919 fully pretending yourself to this or just forgetting about that and then going to this and then it’s bro like
1264.96 any guy who’s going through this issue they know that like when when the naps
1270.48 take over there is no taco yeah bro it’s like yeah
1277.84 it’s like they don’t care about anything it’s like it’s like in finding nemo i’ve said i said this in like my very first
1284.24 video on youtube um but it’s like i called it the finding nemo effect where you remember uh the
1290.64 shark how the shark was like all all cool and everything wanted to like be friends like fish your friends not food yeah but
1297.6 then it’s like when uh the blue fish dory had like smacked herself she had a
1302.799 little bit of blood that like came out and then the shark smelled and his eyes just went black and then
1308.88 from there he just turned to like predator attack mode i was like well that’s what happens to us like when our knives take over we
1315.44 basically it’s like we’re no longer in control like we’re no longer here like we take the back seat something else is
1321.039 driving and um i don’t think this is the time and place for me to like say in detail what joe or
1327.6 ro jogen had said ro jogen yeah well roy jogen has said when he’s
1334.24 it’s like when you’re when you’re doing the deed it’s it’s like you’re driving a bus
1339.44 have you have you guys heard that no uh bro i i’m not gonna say it because it’s
1345.36 it’s just this is haram haram making light of a situation that
1351.12 shouldn’t be made lighter you know that’s a series so again
1357.36 this is the second part is figuring out what your day-to-day routine is like
1364.64 understanding that you can’t just change one thing keep everything the same like romney said if if at 7 pm you are in
1371.919 your bed and you are about to you know do something you shouldn’t
1377.919 quit being in your bed at 7 p.m like do something else go be with your family go be with your friends go go outside for a
1384.48 walk or something like these are things that you have to change you have to change your cycle you have to change your patterns of behavior
1391.679 if you want these changes to stick why is this because there’s two things that can
1396.72 happen you either put all your attention in trying to get past the old
1402.64 or you put all your attention in trying to build the new yeah yeah and i want to actually jump on that point there
1408.159 because a lot of people are going to be like okay i’ll just get married right and although that works for some people believe it or not it’s not actually a
1413.52 solution because what happens to a lot of people unfortunately is you they end up carrying that issue
1418.72 of uh whatever whatever yeah that addiction into their marriage now they’re watching things other women
1424.559 on their phone while they’re married that actually happens and you know this maybe this is too soon to talk about it
1430.32 maybe we’ll save it for another episode but it’s all fake and they’re setting themselves up for fairly when they
1435.679 condition themselves to see these women that they see in these videos even on tick tock and tv and other places women don’t look like that they don’t and the
1442.159 things they’ll do to their bodies one person was telling me about it they will literally bleach downstairs to make it
1447.36 look more appealing or attractive they’ll do disgusting things it’s all fake it’s not
1452.559 gonna happen these are like there’s like 15 people in the room bro yeah while they’re getting
1458.159 a man and all that stuff audio video crew lighting yeah you know it’s literally
1463.919 saying uh cut action yeah yeah literally like like i always i don’t wanna call
1469.36 you off but i do wanna make a quick point here there’s this guy i was watching on youtube and he made this analogy he was like would you ever be in
1475.919 a room where two people are having intimacy and would you just sit in the corner and like get off to them
1481.919 no it sounds weird but it’s the same thing though with the screen of pixels yeah what everyone’s doing you know yeah 100
1488.88 100 i had made the analogy a long time ago where it’s like if you’re hungry
1494.24 do you watch other people eat or do you go and eat mmm yeah speaking of mrs b of course
1500.4 yeah yeah 100 and um just to add on to the whole kind of idea that it’s fake it’s like you know you ever see the video like on like
1507.039 some videos on youtube or on tv or on tick tock it’s like uh these actions performed by professionals do not attempt at home
1513.76 unfortunately they are professionals they have no sensitivity down there after a certain while they will literally do anything
1520.159 they don’t feel it anymore your wife is not going to perform like that i’m talking to men because mainly men struggle with this right your wife’s not
1525.919 going to perform like that if you think if you think she is you’re in the wrong place and you’re going to ruin her life
1531.679 because she’s going to be depressed and upset that she can’t please you and she’s going to think she’s broken it’s her fault and you’re broken it’s your
1536.96 fault something you need to fix so marriage is actually not the solution to that problem unfortunately a lot of
1542.4 parents will encourage that line of thinking if you’re a parent that’s not the line of things you should have you should have the line of thinking of one
1547.84 i messed up i should have taught my son about this before i even hit puberty my fault i take the l i move on second
1553.76 point okay now let me deal with it if they won’t listen to you get someone they will listen to to talk to them about it they need to resolve this on
1559.6 their own using the things that we talked about send them this video inshallah and i’ll let you guys take it from there i wanna i wanna say one more
1565.84 point two before we kind of wrap up this chapter but a lot of the things that we will talk about
1571.44 now onward in the podcast is going to be you know at least for this episode is what you notice when you’re doing it and
1577.679 why you should actually want to change in the first place because a lot of people are like bro why should i work out why should i worry about mental
1583.76 health so we talked about that right but why should people get over this addiction why should this be something that they stop what is the benefit of
1590.72 nofap right but before we talk about the benefits how does it mess up your life there’s one thing i want to talk about
1596.159 which is this whole fetish right you’re basically desensitizing yourself to watching a guy
1602.88 on a screen basically have intimacy with a woman that you wish you were in place of like
1610.159 you wish you could swap places with that guy you wish you could be with that woman in that in that moment
1615.36 stuck for allah but instead of doing it right in a permissible way you now are basically
1622.08 it’s like his success is your success his game is your game and you kind of get off to the fact that
1628.08 okay i can’t do it but i’ll be okay with that and and that’s the root of where this whole fetish comes from bro
1633.6 people today are are literally paying thousands of dollars to escorts to come and take their wife in front of them
1639.039 just because that’s that’s the only thing that could get them off bro but aside from that what other dangers
1644.48 or or reasons do you guys have that people should quit this in the first place well one thing that i heard is desensitization yes not just
1652.039 desensitization downstairs if i even say the word correctly not just that because i heard that you know literally touching
1658.399 yourself like that in that you know vigorous and honestly um disrespectful manner you know rubbing
1665.279 yourself like that you desensitize you’re actually damaging your your nerves down there so you stop
1670.88 feeling more and more over time you feel less and less over time and it’s very harmful damaging and it makes actually
1676.72 doing the deed harder and harder it’s not just that it actually gets you so fixated on the the the rise that you get
1683.84 out of it that that dopamine you get out of it you become desensitized more and more to
1689.2 that as well to the point where maybe even actually having intercourse and being with a woman is just
1694.96 not that great to you you know if take a man who’s never ever stimulated himself in his life and he’s with a
1701.12 woman for the first time that’s gonna be the second third fourth fifth time of his life is gonna be the time of his
1707.12 life you take someone who’s been doing it every day for the past like 10 years it’s not going to be as enjoyable for
1712.159 the guy he’s going to be messed up and like to add on to that
1717.36 it also desensitizes you in terms of like not physical stimulation
1724.159 but the mental stimulation the the what’s happening here like in your mind
1730.24 in your brain yeah and it’s like you know when we are engaging in intimacy we have
1735.84 certain neurotransmitters that are being released you don’t have to get into crazy detail but you have one like
1743.279 dopamine serotonin these are very very important especially when you are
1749.679 engaged in intimacy now when a man is watching a
1754.96 i don’t know well what’s the word what are we going to use the word for so we don’t get caught in video rhythm
1760.399 when uh uh when when a man is watching and he’s watching
1765.6 right what ends up happening is you’re getting this unnatural release of dopamine into
1770.96 your system you’re not going to get that when you naturally engage with your screen never
1776.96 right now what’s happening here is like not only are you getting this unnatural amount of dopamine
1782.48 but you’re setting yourself up for like certain things like you’re expecting certain things and
1788.159 and it’s been known that it’s called the uh the coolidge effect
1793.44 something like that you’re you’re going to progressively get into more hardcore things mm-hmm as you
1801.2 watch slippery slope bro so yeah it’s a slippery slope if you get to this point like listen there’s a lot of dudes out
1807.36 there that have become gay because of this stuff because they start watching it and they
1812.799 start getting into such nasty stuff that they actually start watching guys with guys and we’re animals bro for
1821.2 bro like they kids they get and look it’s you might think to yourself oh i stuck for a lot i would never do this no
1827.039 bro like you’re not safe like no one is safe from this so you have this guy
1832.799 he starts watching this stuff he gets to the point where he’s watching other dudes and now he’s confused he doesn’t even know like well am i straight am i
1838.799 gay like what’s going on here and then it’s like let’s say he actually does have a wife but he’s dealing with this
1845.039 like that’s gonna add even more so to him experiencing issues in the intimacy
1850.559 so the dangers like bro you ask what are the dangers about the dangers is too much to list man yeah yeah it’s
1857.6 too much to list yeah yeah and i just to stress the point about um
1862.88 what you just mentioned you called the coolidge effect but getting more hardcore over time just to stress how
1869.039 effective or how dominant the topic the factor of psychology is when it comes to intimacy
1875.84 sexuality what you find attractive and that stuff there are and we talked about this i think like episode three or something
1881.679 there are only three ways you can actually have a characteristic right physical characteristics even other
1886.96 types of characteristics there’s either biology or more specifically genetics right but
1893.12 overall biology right so those two genetics and overall biology and then there’s psychology the psychological or
1900.88 character characteristics that you have you know things that you develop to like or dislike or so on and so forth right
1906.399 you might absolutely despise something because you were raised you were brought up and taught to despise it as a
1912.799 psychological thing you could in another world actually adore and love that thing because you were taught to love it so on
1918.24 and so forth it’s like people being taught to love islam to love the prophet peace be upon him and others being taught the non-muslims being taught to
1924.48 hate islam hate the prophet you know and same thing if you look at like fetishes
1930.72 for example a lot of them if not most of them a lot of them are the result of childhood
1936.32 trauma unresolved childhood trauma and that doesn’t come out but it stays within and when it stays within it
1942.559 results in that kind of sexual manner unfortunately now psychology is something that obviously it’s not like
1948.08 you know you hit four and this is your psychology the rest of your life you could be 30 and have changes in your psychology that’s why people develop you
1954.399 know psychological disorders and so on and so forth because depending on how you live your life your environment what you perceive what you observe your mind your
1961.6 psychology the way you think whether it’s major or minor is going to change over time so people who think that you
1967.039 know and we live in a sexually promiscuous society unfortunately so people don’t you know understand this for what it is
1973.6 but if you underestimate it it will catch up to you hmm
1981.6 do you have anything to add to that bro before we go on to the benefits
1986.799 aside from just draining yourself bro having no energy messing up your testosterone bro
1993.36 like i don’t know why anyone would justify a bro today there’s no reason bro
1998.96 arami you know how in the quran allah says something like is the reward for good anything but can you what is that that
2005.679 ayah oh yeah is there a reward for a good uh aside from good or something aside from good yeah is there is there a reason i’m not
2012.64 trying to compare this but it’s like is there a reason to abstain from bad aside from bad itself like the fact that you’re doing this and it’s damaged like
2019.6 do you need another reason like it’s literally destroying your soul bro people have gone on the dark web and
2025.6 like 85 to 90 of it is just cp that’s that’s that’s disgusting bro i
2031.12 thought it was like people want to buy things that they can’t buy in the normal market and stuff like that that’s all it is bro and it’s it’s it’s crazy and it’s
2037.919 like the rope like in the west we literally have islands bro
2044.159 no we ain’t saying that over here but bro in the west we literally we won’t allow polygeny where a man takes care of
2051.44 his women folk and has accountability over them but you like just for this false sense
2057.119 of like let’s put on this image that there’s this one woman man and these men are cheating anyway
2062.879 they’re going to islands and having these things like epstein like bro like islam is so clean and pure
2069.44 but society just wants fascia and and filth and then haram and
2074.879 this whole backwardness bro bro and i think like the biggest
2081.119 thing that i’m gonna lay on the table here pause and um so i’m sure y’all
2087.44 or anyone who has gone through this will understand any time
2093.28 that you do something that’s haram so it doesn’t just have to part you know mean this but anytime you do something that’s
2099.44 haram you go against allah you don’t get rewarded
2105.44 you get punished like you know if we die in that state of
2111.119 punishment like imagine the the punishment that’s going to be in that you have to like i wouldn’t want that i wouldn’t want that for anyone either
2117.28 but it’s like i’m saying right now like any time like in my life when things have been going really good and i’ve
2123.04 done something that i’ve gone completely against allah even when i wasn’t a muslim even when i didn’t have this
2128.48 understanding the moment that i would do that it’s like for the next weeks to months i would just be punished
2135.2 until like i learned my lesson so to speak until like i came to my senses and like really realized like
2142.8 the wrong that i did and was able to grow from that experience you know and i think that’s something
2148.72 that we have to keep in mind where it’s like like come on man like
2155.04 it’s we’re all about progress here that sounds kind of weird cause like you
2160.16 know you got people saying oh islam is not progressive i’m not talking about that i’m saying like we all want to make
2166.4 progress right like if let’s say you’re playing a video game you want to get better in the video game
2171.92 you’re progressing you’re getting your stats up getting the armor weapons all this stuff right in real
2177.28 life like what we are doing when you’re getting closer to allah like you you it’s it’s like a status bar like
2184.4 you have to progress to get closer to allah like you’re building a business you have to progress to the point where
2190.64 like this business is fully set up you’re building your body you have to progress to the point where your body is
2195.68 fully developed yeah right like there’s there’s this time and every time that you go against allah every time you do
2202.16 something every time you you do this you’re essentially just going backwards going backwards and and
2209.76 each time that you try to go forward again like you’re starting at a place that’s
2214.96 further back than where you were before so it’s like why would you do that knowing that clearly you can make it to
2221.2 that angle you can make it to the point where you have that close connection with allah like you have the barakah and
2228.4 i don’t know this is just you know like i’m just throwing my thoughts out here but it’s something that
2233.599 people in this situation dudes in this situation really need to keep in mind if
2239.359 if this is really that important to them i want to go into the superpowers bro the quote unquote superpowers that you
2245.68 get once you quit benefits okay so even if it’s
2251.2 does it is it true that it makes hair grow on your palms or it causes you to get blind
2260.32 no uh okay so in terms of the superpowers
2266.079 people will experience benefits in regards to like how bad off they were
2272.0 like for instance if we have an example of uh the benefits that people experience
2277.2 when they get onto this it’s all dependent on how you know bad off they were so let’s say you have
2284.0 this guy who is releasing like five six times a day
2291.2 which is not that much all right there’s a lot of guys that go even more than this that’s crazy um yeah
2298.079 it is stuck for a lot it’s crazy you have
2304.4 dude who’s doing like five six times she’s laughing about it i’m loving the new sound that romney got yeah i wish we
2310.56 had all right but you had this guy he’s doing it like five six times a day
2317.52 okay this guy will experience more benefits than the guy who’s maybe doing it like
2323.28 one time every three four days yeah because the guy’s doing one time every
2328.56 three four days like he never developed that bad of an issue now um
2333.599 when you start getting deeper and deeper into it because you’re having such
2338.88 unnatural amounts of dopamine being released into your your brain your mind it’s it’s causing
2345.52 you to be in a state that’s very unnatural and um
2350.88 nothing in this world replicates that amount of dopamine like
2355.92 you can’t i can’t sit here and talk to you have a normal conversation and have the same amount of dopamine yeah from
2361.599 this conversation as i would if i was over here watching adult films yeah doing it five
2367.92 six times a day i can’t yeah i can’t so this person when they stop
2373.52 it’s like the brain begins to literally heal and now it’s like they’re sensitizing
2379.44 themselves to all these things and because they’re sensitizing themselves they start to experience these benefits
2385.44 benefits could be like increased eye contact they’re able to increase their eye contact they’re able to have
2391.44 more focus they um they feel more confident right like why they feel more confident
2396.72 because they’re less stuck in their head you know like they’re in a conversation and they feel like they can connect with the other
2402.72 person why can they connect with the other person because they’re actually there they’re present the amount of
2408.48 dopamine they’re getting from that interaction is enough for them to [Music]
2413.599 function to actually be there and be connected with them they can go outside they can see the birds flying around and
2420.319 they will have an impact on them versus before they might have seen the birds and it’s like
2426.0 eh like it is what it is right so that’s and that’s that’s the benefits
2431.44 now as far as like what benefits you’re going to experience that’s that’s different for everyone
2437.18 [Music] so you don’t get x-ray vision like i just want to know uh only if you go at least like three
2444.16 four years masha’allah three four years um if you
2449.599 guys did make it this far let us know what you guys think um not that the episode’s over anything like that but
2455.599 quick word from our sponsor rami are we doing that now yeah throw it in i
2462.56 was actually thinking maybe we should why not i don’t have anything prepared um that’s
2467.599 true okay guys insha allah see you guys next week same thing i’m just playing um
2472.64 one question i had for both of you all right we don’t want to air our sins or stuff in the past or anything like that
2478.079 obviously as muslims we should have hayah and in our past otherwise put a blanket over right but
2484.24 to the brothers and sisters that think it’s so normal bro everyone’s doing it
2490.24 you know that brother ana was talking about on the podcast that does the six or six does it eight nine ten times a
2495.359 day i’m only doing it once a day or i’m only doing it once a week is it really that bad that i’m not as bad as everyone
2501.68 else oh everyone else is going to the club and drinking and all this i just drink with my co-workers once a year on
2508.16 the annual whatever gala you know oh everyone else is smoking like with everyone recreationally i only do it
2514.4 when i when i’m just you know i’m done my work you know i study and i get my work done you know all these people that
2519.52 try to like rationalize it and they say this whole i’m not that far gone what’s what’s what’s the harm in a little bit
2526.24 well this is this reminds me of this video i saw from newman ali khan i think y’all y’all might know which one
2531.76 i’m talking about nope how do we lose our iman i think it’s that one where he’s saying like um this
2537.28 comparison thing it’s it’s of the dunya and it’s actually a sickness but he’s like what are you gonna do like let’s
2543.44 say you were praying x amount of times but you were doing all these things bad right and then you raised up on the day
2549.44 of judgment and allah is like oh you did this and you do that he’s like oh but like
2554.64 compared to this this brother over here like he was barely praying like you sh you should just give me the like a
2560.88 straight ticket to jenna like i should be vip janna right away because i did
2566.4 much better than this guy over here it’s like well it’s the same thing it’s a sickness you know you can’t look
2571.599 at someone else and be like oh well i’m not doing it uh to the same extent as them so
2577.359 i’m better off like i’m not gonna have a what i’m laughing about something from
2582.48 yesterday bro yeah you remember when rami went to bed and we were watching the the podcast
2589.46 [Laughter] yo i just want to give a quick shout out
2595.359 to our editor guys mashallah like link’s in the description for his instagram or socials or whatever but like huge shout
2601.68 out to our editor for just always being on point with the edits color grading everything’s done alhamdulillah it’s a
2607.04 good word bro but that being said i think we are going to wrap up this episode since we are getting a little brain dead stay tuned
2613.2 for next week insha allah we’re going to go into a little bit deeper of the topics and go into the actual intimacy stuff
2618.8 um aside from that do y’all have anything to say yeah i wanted to answer the question do you want to finish off what are you saying first
2624.56 um i wanted to leave him with like the final part of the game so uh you uh what was your question
2631.28 again i had something so like all of these people trying to like i remember right now play devil’s advocate like yeah oh yeah i’m not as bad as everyone
2637.359 else yeah yeah so i want to take it from two different angles right
2642.4 no no you’re the only one that ah this is haram
2661.119 the dirtiest mind bro it’s always the quiet ones well he’s finally come out
2666.24 all right so i want to approach this discussion from two different viewpoints respectively
2672.88 in sha allah if i may so the first viewpoint i would like to
2678.48 discuss is first i want to question their line of thinking their logic right so everyone’s doing it and everyone
2683.839 thinks it’s cool and you think it’s wrong yeah what what were people in america doing during
2688.88 the cross-atlantic slave trade what were they propagating what were they encouraging what did they think was normal back then would we have the same
2694.48 views today you know a few decades ago even in world war ii in germany what were people propagating there would you then say
2701.2 that you know since it was a majority it was okay it was morally acceptable or blah blah you wouldn’t same thing here look at people who are smoking people
2707.52 who are drinking people who are on drugs and so on so there’s so many people doing it does that mean it’s a good thing it’s beneficial it’s going to help
2713.04 you or does it mean that it’s not going to harm you no not at all actually many things even medical
2719.04 practitioners will actually recommend things that are harmful to uh to a person remember we were talking about in
2724.16 the episode about transgenderism in the documentary what is a woman and all that stuff they uncovered a lot of stuff there’s a lot of dark things that people
2730.72 will push now that normalize that they say it’s okay but it’s not so that’s one
2735.92 the uh the logic of it two i wanna discuss um these people
2742.4 and look at other people doing it and so on and so forth why not only why is it majority rule but the
2749.2 second point i want to make on it is just because someone’s doing it worse doesn’t somehow uh excuse you from it it
2755.359 might make you better in contrast to them right but it’s still fallacious in the sense that it doesn’t actually remove the original deed the original
2761.2 sin from you all right if if i come and i’m like you know i have the let’s say angel
2766.319 tells me not to eat the last um you know i don’t know a piece of chicken or whatever and i go and i eat it anyways
2772.16 and he comes and he’s like why did you eat it you know i asked you not to and i say it’s not like i ate the whole thing yeah i didn’t eat the whole thing but
2779.2 that doesn’t actually excuse me from the fact that he asked me not to eat it and then i ate it anyways the same thing here it’s you know imagine asking the
2784.56 day of judgement allah asks you why do you do this and you say well at least at least i didn’t do this well is that is
2789.76 that going to excuse you i imagine you’re in court you know you you you murdered a person and they’re like why
2795.68 did you do it and you’re like well at least i didn’t murder the whole family you know that’s not like no you should just let me go yanny it’s fallacious i
2802.48 know that’s an extreme example but it still applies there you know just doing it once a day once a month once a year
2807.599 is still worse yes it’s worse than not doing it at all and if anything you should be comparing yourself to someone
2812.72 who doesn’t do it at all i want to say one point before on wraps it up but this whole notion of just once not
2818.8 listen if you’re on a streak right now and you’re thinking of relapsing because you just want to you know just do it get it off once so you think just what’s
2824.64 what’s one time gonna what is it gonna do listen you do it once you’re done yeah it’s
2830.0 over as soon as you do it that first time you’re already gonna be in it too deep as soon as you do it the first time you’re gonna get back into the cycle of
2836.0 like doing a couple times a week or a month or whatever you do just don’t even do it that one time don’t fall for the trip uh tricks of shaytan don’t even
2843.04 give it that that footstep bro yeah remember we were talking about in the car right that’s exactly what i was saying
2848.079 it was you right me and you in the car i don’t know ends up ends up being something else no no i’m pretty sure i was i don’t know if you were there or
2854.16 not but i was saying you know a lot of people they they have this idea of oh i know i just want to party one see what i
2859.44 said i just want to drink once i just want to smoke i just want to see what it’s like you’re better off not knowing what it’s like
2864.72 because your curiosity of what it’s like is not stronger or worse than wanting to do it
2870.319 a second time after feeling whatever you feel afterwards people do it because it feels good imagine you do it you know
2876.16 what it feels like why wouldn’t you want it even more that second time you’re better now having not done it a day in
2881.599 your life or having not done it for a month or two months or a year or 10 years or whatever then try and get once just to get it out
2887.52 there how do you understand how do you how do you think the the psychology of addiction even happens people have this amazing high the first time and they
2893.359 want to recreate that first high so they do second time third time fourth time before they’re in it ten years doing other things other substances just to
2900.16 recreate that first high when in reality they’ll never be able to recreate that bro yeah yeah that’s very true it’ll
2905.68 never happen you want to end it off bro that point well before i end it off i want to say
2911.92 like you also these people they can’t think to themselves like oh
2918.559 allah is the most forgiving and the most merciful so i just have to repent
2923.76 that’s like dude that’s like oh i’m about to i was about to say about to finish someone off
2929.68 but i’m about to end someone’s life oh but allah is the most merciful i’m going to repent
2935.599 i’m going to eat this pork but i’m going to ask for repentance i have to like or just say bismuth before you eat it stuff
2942.64 for a lot like oh i’m gonna drink this alcohol but i’m gonna ask for you know forgiveness
2947.68 it’s basically like what we said in that one episode where you have a
2953.92 this like a bad action with a good intention or good in good action with the attention right now you have this this
2960.72 bad action and then you have the intention of like basically asking for forgiveness i’m sorry but like
2967.839 i’m not i’m not allah but if i had to judge like
2973.52 i wouldn’t accept someone’s forgiveness they’re clearly going into it knowing like yeah one of the um well not to cut you
2980.559 off but one of the conditions of tawba is that you are sincere yeah there’s nothing sincere imagine imagine someone
2986.8 coming to you right let’s not make it about us and allah imagine someone comes to you they’re like listen i’m going to
2992.48 punch you but i’m going to ask for forgiveness afterwards right there’s no class there bro not only are
2997.68 they you know punching you but if anything they they don’t mean the apology exactly it’s premeditated but if
3004.24 they just like if y’all were playing around and then they actually like just jabbed you in the face and they’re like
3009.68 yo like i’m so sorry bro like are you all right are you all right yeah bro that’s sincerity yeah and on top of that
3015.68 afterwards we’re like i’m we’re not starting we’re not going to spar anymore i’m sorry bro yeah we’re not going to do it anymore it’s sincerity yeah 100
3021.2 sincerity 100 but turn it all off
3026.88 look into their souls bro to end it all off you now know
3033.839 why you are doing what you are doing you now know that you have to change your day-to-day routine
3040.48 your cycle your patterns of behavior you now know the downfalls
3046.48 and you know the rewards the benefits the pros and the cons you know this
3051.68 so now to bring it all together you have to make this priority now to where you’re putting all your attention on it
3058.4 because it should there should be something in the background while you are implementing your new life but it should be the main priority for you to
3065.68 get past this like if you want to get married you should not even be thinking about getting married until this is no
3072.16 longer a factor in your life if you are with a significant other
3077.52 and you guys are having issues listen until you get over this you
3083.599 should not be thinking about anything else yeah you should not i just told him not to think about this but you should
3088.72 not be doing anything else but like it has to take priority in your life you can’t see it as like oh um you know
3097.119 like i’ll get over it eventually that’s it’s not gonna work like that it listen you have to go
3103.76 all in with this you have to do whatever it is that you have to do everyone’s going to
3109.76 be different here you know some people some people for them it takes them saying
3115.92 an oath out loud to allah like putting everything on the table well i know this guy
3122.24 who he actually said something like this and
3127.28 he ended up doing the thing that he said he wasn’t going to do that he promised to allah it was crazy allah it was crazy
3134.319 and what ended up happening is that when he did it he thought to himself oh no it’s
3140.319 not going to happen so he asked for forgiveness but in his mind he thought it wasn’t going to happen
3146.24 what he put on the table what he he basically said to a lot like oh love like if i go back like just strip this
3152.319 away just take this away from me yeah allah took everything away from me everything that he put on the table he
3158.64 he thought it wasn’t gonna happen he thought it was a joke he thought like oh that it’s i just you know like it’s not
3164.24 gonna happen right not allah took everything away from him and i mean like
3170.16 you gotta you gotta put into what’s with heaven and that’s where the priority comes into play here you do whatever you
3176.88 can to get past this this isn’t something to be taken lightheartedly this is a serious thing
3183.359 and just know that your life will be better once you do get past it
3189.119 in every way shape or form inshallah and with that being said
3194.31 [Music]
3202.4 my [Music]
3210.72 um [Music]
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